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Caregiving should be a shared responsibility and not the default duty of women. Because caregivers need support too. #WomenOnTheMove
The amendment to the Maternity Bill, that has now been increased to 26 weeks, was received with much fanfare. It was a welcome move. However, contrary to popular perception caregiving does not only comprise of childcare; it includes crucial forms of other care too – care for the terminally ill, disabled and the elderly.
Elder care in India is massively understated and uncared for. Elder care demands daily care, weekly medical supervision, sometimes treatments and consistent close attention. But the lack of a sustainable leave policy makes it difficult for many people to care for their aging parents. Also, lack of institutional support forces many to hire private nurses and caregivers to help them with the daily care. But hiring private caregivers is an expensive affair; hence, many take up the responsibility themselves, sometimes at the cost of giving up their jobs.
Last week, we had our weekly #WomenOnTheMove chat over at Twitter, where we discussed why in India caregiving is usually assumed to be the women’s responsibility rather it should be a shared responsibility. This is what they said.
(If you’re not yet following Women’s Web on Twitter, do now, and you can come over for the chat too, every Wednesday 6-7PM IST).
@womensweb It is due to this society’s perception that women are born to care for others!!!Her opinion isn’t asked for!!! #WomenOnTheMove — Sadhuvi (@sadhuvi81) August 30, 2017
@womensweb It is due to this society’s perception that women are born to care for others!!!Her opinion isn’t asked for!!! #WomenOnTheMove
— Sadhuvi (@sadhuvi81) August 30, 2017
Woman is perhaps the Super Lady who has to manage home, work and everything. She is bounded to care without being cared for — Manpreet Kaur (@Manpreet__Kaur) August 30, 2017
Woman is perhaps the Super Lady who has to manage home, work and everything. She is bounded to care without being cared for
— Manpreet Kaur (@Manpreet__Kaur) August 30, 2017
Whom are we kidding with shared responsibilities? Have the men been ever taught to do anything around at home? #Womenonthemove — Anamika Agnihotri (@AnAgnihotri) August 30, 2017
Whom are we kidding with shared responsibilities? Have the men been ever taught to do anything around at home? #Womenonthemove
— Anamika Agnihotri (@AnAgnihotri) August 30, 2017
@womensweb If a DIL is expected to take care of Inlaws when they aren’t well Why we don’t expect the same from a Son in law #WomenOnTheMove — Sadhuvi (@sadhuvi81) August 30, 2017
@womensweb If a DIL is expected to take care of Inlaws when they aren’t well Why we don’t expect the same from a Son in law #WomenOnTheMove
All of us have, sometimes even parents of girls feel that we owe all time and allegiance to our married families & not them #WomenOnTheMove — Pooja Sharma Rao (@SoulVersified) August 30, 2017
All of us have, sometimes even parents of girls feel that we owe all time and allegiance to our married families & not them #WomenOnTheMove
— Pooja Sharma Rao (@SoulVersified) August 30, 2017
Can you please bust the myth that women are natural caregivers, and are supposed to always take care of others and the home. #WomenOnTheMove — Yeshna Dindoyal (@_Yeshna) August 30, 2017
Can you please bust the myth that women are natural caregivers, and are supposed to always take care of others and the home. #WomenOnTheMove
— Yeshna Dindoyal (@_Yeshna) August 30, 2017
Society has glorified women as epitome of compassion….so cannot express negative feelings or fatigue…get labelled as mean and selfish — Scienceandsamosa (@ScienceSamosa) August 30, 2017
Society has glorified women as epitome of compassion….so cannot express negative feelings or fatigue…get labelled as mean and selfish
— Scienceandsamosa (@ScienceSamosa) August 30, 2017
Left my job to take care of my grandmom who’d fractured her hip bone. #WomenOnTheMove — rashi mital (@Rashi_AMital) August 30, 2017
Left my job to take care of my grandmom who’d fractured her hip bone. #WomenOnTheMove
— rashi mital (@Rashi_AMital) August 30, 2017
@womensweb My friend’s mother resigned her job to take care of Inlaws but my friend’s father didn’t even take needed leave! #WomenOnTheMove — Sadhuvi (@sadhuvi81) August 30, 2017
@womensweb My friend’s mother resigned her job to take care of Inlaws but my friend’s father didn’t even take needed leave! #WomenOnTheMove
I looked after my dad who passed away 2yrs ago & now a long distance caregiver for my mother, with parenting,work & chronicillness of my own — Pooja Sharma Rao (@SoulVersified) August 30, 2017
I looked after my dad who passed away 2yrs ago & now a long distance caregiver for my mother, with parenting,work & chronicillness of my own
https://t.co/TqL5UgOaEz of my frns mother left her family to support her aging parents.She even left her kids to be with her ailing mother. — Shipra Trivedi (@trivediship) August 30, 2017
https://t.co/TqL5UgOaEz of my frns mother left her family to support her aging parents.She even left her kids to be with her ailing mother.
— Shipra Trivedi (@trivediship) August 30, 2017
again cliches children can be taught equal rights and duties if the parents raise them right. #WomenOnTheMove — Pooja Sharma Rao (@SoulVersified) August 30, 2017
again cliches children can be taught equal rights and duties if the parents raise them right. #WomenOnTheMove
Share the load between sons and daughters, wife and husbands #WomenOnTheMove — Yeshna Dindoyal (@_Yeshna) August 30, 2017
Share the load between sons and daughters, wife and husbands #WomenOnTheMove
Image: Pixabay
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Being a writer, Nivedita Louis recognises the struggles of a first-time woman writer and helps many articulate their voice with development, content edits as a publisher.
“I usually write during night”, says author Nivedita Louis during our conversation. Chuckling she continues,” It’s easier then to focus solely on writing. Nivedita Louis is a writer, with varied interests and one of the founders of Her Stories, a feminist publishing house, based in Chennai.
In a candid conversation she shared her journey from small-town Tamil Nadu to becoming a history buff, an award-winning author and now a publisher.
Nivedita was born and raised in a small town in Tamil Nadu. It was for schooling that she first arrived in Chennai. Then known as Madras, she recalls being awed by the city. Her love-story with the city, its people and thus began which continues till date. She credits her perseverance and passion to make a difference to her days as a vocational student among the elite sections of Madras.
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