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I was raised by a single mom, and knowing what I know about her life, would like to call single mothers as 'independent mothers'.
I was raised by a single mom, and knowing what I know about her life, would like to call single mothers as ‘independent mothers’.
You do not know how strong you are until strong is the only choice you have. This is true in my case as I have been raised by a strong single parent, my mother. We all hear about single mothers a lot these days, but even today, it needs a lot of courage and guts to be a single mother.
Being raised by one, I have experienced life through her eyes. She’s the reason for who I am today.
There are many challenges that a single mother goes through. I will not like to call them ‘single’ but ‘independently operated and owned’ mothers. Right from juggling between work and home, managing their routine, doubling up for every duty, they have to play both roles (of a mom and dad) that too with perfection, especially in a society where men rule.
People look at them with varied questions in mind. And not just that, they even come up to ask, “Who’s running the house for you? Isn’t it difficult to manage without a man in your life? Why don’t you settle down with someone?” All their eyes are on you more than their own selves. You come home late from either a friend’s place, dinner or work, their eyebrows raised again. They feel it isn’t your right to stay out late, cannot travel alone just because you don’t have a man in your life. And if you have a male friend, then it’s all the more worse!
I have had more of friends who are brought up by independent mothers. And I’m proud of the fact. Such children have a completely different perspective to life. They are more independent, strong and fearless towards everything in life.
With due respect to all the others, but independent mothers have to see a bigger picture of life. Attending PTMs for the kids, doing the laundry, grocery, paying bills, working much harder, making the best use of what one has, finding the best schools and colleges for the kids, giving them a good lifestyle, trying to manage time to spend with children, planning their vacation, most of all seeing that their children do not miss out on anything or feel deprived, preparing them for future and most of all being answerable to the world for nothing.
In a world full of challenges, they work tirelessly playing two roles yet they never crib. Being a single mother is not a life full of struggles but a journey of strength. I salute every such woman for giving their kids what they deserve or even more, for thinking about them first, for putting them before self. It definitely isn’t a bed of roses. We owe these women of honour a whole lot for accepting the challenges thrown at them and facing every bit by themselves. You are the real heroes.
A strong woman knows she has enough strength for the journey, but a woman of strength knows it is in the journey where she will become strong.
Published here earlier.
Image source: shutterstock
I'm an independent woman who believes in herself, positive thinker, love reading, writing, travelling. Also a soft skills trainer who's now following her passion for blogging. So pls do read and suggest. Look read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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