Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
Adult babies. What are they, you say? Oh, just the husband and/or in laws who expect you to wait on them just because you are married into their family!
Almost all women in this country can relate to this and all men are going to hate this. But ninety out of hundred woman who get married in this country find themselves in this situation where they discover they have in fact adopted an adult baby in the face of marriage.
I faced the exact situation when I got married. It was a huge disappointment for me. But gradually I realised that almost all families have at least one adult baby. In most cases it is the son (husband Of the girl) whereas in some other extreme cases the in laws too behave like babies. In that case the poor newly married girl finds herself in the middle of mothering a family of adult babies. The biggest reason of depression in women working at home (I prefer to be addressed as WWH than SAHM).
Giving in to their demands not only saps the life out of you but also makes them more dependant. So dear woman, it is time to redefine your duties as wife and daughter in law.
Your duty is to make sure your family is well fed. It is not your duty to make the meals, bring it to the table, wait the table and clean afterwards. For every one. Even if you are sick.
It is your duty to keep the house clean. It is not your duty to pick up after every one.
It is your duty to take care of everyone. It is also their duty to take care of you. And the most important thing is it is also your duty to take care of You.
Teach your kids to participate in household chores. Teach them to make their own bed. Let them pack their school bags. Teach them how to tie their shoe laces, don’t do things for them. Don’t advise them unless they ask for. Let them fall and get get back on their feet.
And as per the already grown up babies, start small. Stop picking up after them. Be firm. It’s not about fighting but do not give in.
Sharing the load should be the new anthem of every family. Lead by example.
Image source: shutterstock
read more...
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
The plight of Indian women's mental health often goes unnoticed. Co-founders Vivek Satya Mitram and Pooja Priyamvada conceived the idea of the Bharat Dialogues Women & Mental Health Summit to address this.
Trigger Warning: This contains descriptions of mental health trauma and suicide, and may be triggering for survivors.
Author’s note: The language and phraseology used are not the author’s words but the terms and narrative popularly used for people living with mental illnesses, and may feel non-inclusive. It is merely for putting our point across better.
I have seen how horrifying was the treatment given to those with mental illness.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
Please enter your email address