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A new wedding jewellery ad is driving us crazy. Why is this bride crying for her dream wedding like it was a laddoo that mom kept away for another day?
A new wedding jewellery ad is driving us crazy. And not in a good way. Why is this bride crying for her dream wedding like it was a laddoo that mom kept away for another day?
You know how as a 5 year old, you cried for that Barbie doll, and then as a 10 year old, for that shiny new hairband all the girls in class were wearing? That’s how life continues for the Average Indian Woman, until at 15 we cry for that new phone and at 25….for our parents to organise our dream wedding…NOT!
Somewhere along the way, that little girl grew up, got her degree, found a job, and picked up a good pay cheque too. If she wanted something, she went out and got it for herself, and puhlease, what she wanted was so much more than just for Mumma and Papa to give her the big fat wedding (no, make that obscenely fat wedding).
Except it looks like some brands haven’t yet got that memo.
If not, why else would we still be seeing an ad like this?
This ‘poor’ woman’s dream in life is to be ‘allowed’ to paint even after she gets married. Gasp, whoever heard of that! What’s more, she is so suppressed that the family won’t even allow her to plan her own wedding background scene. If that doesn’t show you just how suppressed women in India are, nothing will, believe me.
What, did someone say women in India are actually fighting everyday with their own families to be allowed to do things like study, work, be with a man (or woman) of their choice? Scratch all that. Clearly, the big ask in a woman’s life is to dress up like Mumtaz Mahal and wear the blingiest wedding jewellery she can find. Not only will she whine about it like a 5 year old crying for a Barbie, she has no visible life whatsoever beyond doing what her family (and strangely distant fiancé) require of her.
I understand that brands have to market their products, and fair enough – I don’t actually have anything against wearing jewellery at your wedding, less or more. Whatever floats your boat. But can brands please show real women, who may want a dream wedding, but are not sulking for mummy-papa to hand them one like the latest model Barbie? It’s not clear either why the parents, brother and everyone else feel compelled to diss every idea the woman has – and then after making her feel horrible for no reason, magnanimously give her the wedding she wanted.
Sure she has nothing to do beyond dream of a Hum Aapke Hain Kaun wedding, but still, if you’re going to spend a bazillion rupees on a wedding, why not consult the bride? But that doesn’t work because, hey, why bother talking to a grown woman when you can walk over her!
Perhaps the folks making the ad thought it would be ’empowering’ to show a woman standing up for her right-to-a-dream-wedding. If that was the case, can we go back to the good old days when jewellery ads had no pretensions to empowerment and simply focused on covering the bride in a nice haze of gold from head to toe?
Top image is a screenshot from the ad
I may look sleepy, but I'm pretty wide awake. Feminist techie. Haunts the library. Kills the patriarchy in her spare time. read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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