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Want to attain Nirvana in parenting? Here is how you can protect yourself from losing your sanity by the time your child is 5.
The baby is here. The baby is home. You are overjoyed to see tiny eyes and tiny fingers and tiny toes. As soon as it is night for you, it is a bright morning for the baby! Time to work.
The first year goes by.
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The second year goes by too. You have already got enlightened on what ‘Parenting’ involves. You have learned on the job. However, it takes a little more to attain that Nirvana in parenting; you know what I mean?
Nirvana in parenting. Nirvana that is not attained under a tree. Nirvana that is probably attained when all of the following are true for you. Read on!
You have been living in the abode of nomads. In fact, you have been a nomad yourself. Look around and take an inventory of things strewn around. Books, bags, toys, half eaten candies, cookies made gooey with a lot of licking, the head of a broken Spiderman, the limb of a malnourished doll, lots of play-clay stuffed into the mouths of poor toy figures, an angry bird blind in one eye making it look less angry, and more such impeccable treasures are strewn everywhere so that walking normally is no more possible in the house.
By the end of the fourth year of being a parent, you can be sure that you can participate in the Gymnastics events in the next Olympics; possibly in all categories, the vault, the pommel horse, or the rings!
You have actually stopped looking at the mirror. One look and you realize you are wearing what looks like a pillow cover paired with pyjamas that are spotted with puke, food, snot, and what not! Another look at your wardrobe, and you see that all you have there are pillow covers for yourself.
Cleaning up the house every night after the baby has slept off is a breeze for you. Cleaning is basically taking things from everywhere and dumping them in one corner. Changing the corners every night is a smarter way to reorganize.
You know your bathroom trips are going to be the shortest ever recorded. The bathroom stories never change. You are just about to sit on the designated place for a fraction of a second when one shriek in front of the bathroom door makes you put your buttons back in place. Gradually, your body gets acclimatized to a half-sitting position forever because you are ready to jump up at any point in time.
You also become comfortable doing all your bathroom work with a mini audience watching you with curious eyes.
All said and done, you have not attained complete Nirvana until you have done that one thing every parent has to do at least once: fished out, scratch that, spooned out, scratch that too, picked up something that your tiny tot has tossed into the toilet. Your bundle of joy drops her pretty toy into the bowl while in the act, and you have to pick up the pretty toy from a not-so-pretty surrounding with utmost dexterity. And while you are pondering how to go about it, you are secretly fearing that the last resort would be to have your hands take a holy dip in the murky waters.
That, that is when you attain complete Nirvana in parenting.
Victorious, and energized, you are ready to take on the upcoming seismic waves at home!
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Founder of mayodip.com (which is into Virtual Reality), Ex-googler, Mom, Writer.
Ha! ha! Ha! Shravani, I raise both my hands and feet up too in agreement with your hilarious post! All the very best as you discover that once you’ve attained Nirvana, you will be forced several more times in the years that follow to redefine “Nirvana” yet some more!! However, the yuckiest challenges are certainly thrown open to us to overcome, when we are both bedazzled and befuddled by new motherhood and baby dearest is also really at his/her uninhibited best -no holds barred!! That, I have to concede!
true true! I’m sure as we move along, our Nirvana situations and parameters change. Thanks for reading Sonia! Appreciate it.
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