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Gaining weight has always been considered a problem for women in a society that stereotypes them, but I’ve found that it is good for me in so many ways!
Weight has always been ‘the monster term’ for me.
When I was a kid, I was underweight and was continuously advised by everyone to eat properly. And I tried too, thinking that if it doesn’t happen now, it can never happen at all. Short and frail, I could go easily missing in a group. College was even more hopeless, I lost more weight.
It is when I got my first job that I slowly started gaining weight. And today, after 5 years, I am considered fat.
I reminded a few who pointed it out, that I am following the advice they gave me during my childhood and their smile quickly faded. I have been struggling to cross 45 kgs since very long time and now I have. The protruding collarbone that was pointed out by the neighbours, has now been covered amply. Though that is not the healthy weight for my age, it is quite correct for my height. And now, people are advising me to lose weight! And why? Because it is now my ‘marriageable age’ and hence I should look slender (read as beautiful).
I was shell-shocked when a cousin younger to me commented that was I bloating out, looking pityingly at my imaginary future husband in the air. I simply answered that I am the one that in future may carry a baby, not the hubby.
My weight has been everyone else’s business. As a kid, my diary looked very similar to ‘The Diary of a Young Girl’ by Anne Frank and after so many years now, my thoughts too reflect the same. There is constant bombardment about how to lose those beloved kilos over 45.
It took me an extreme effort to not lose my senses, in the least. Eventually, I developed the ‘don’t care’ attitude.
And so, to all the family members who worry about my weight and to all the ladies who are forced to regret it, here is my take on weight gain. There are ‘n’ number of things that these extra few kilos have given me:
Those extra kilos have given me an unimaginable amount of stamina. I don’t think these all would be possible if had bothered about anyone who counts my calories or took a look at the big morsel in my hand.
I am just a normal human being who is very proud to be capable of doing now, what I couldn’t do a few years ago. Today, I feel if there was no one around to remind me often that I am imperfect, I could have achieved all those things long ago and I would have been a lot more optimistic and a tad less of a badass.
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