Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
Ever since we announced my pregnancy at 12 weeks, I had to face this question a lot. Sometimes from complete strangers too.
“You are going to be a mom. How do you feel, eh?”
Like a Pigosaurus.
Yup. That was the first response that would pop up in my mind. Of course I didn’t say it out loud. For two reasons – First, my hormone-ridden moody self couldn’t be arsed into explaining what that meant and second, it wasn’t the expected answer!
Thanks to the cover pictures on the various parenting and baby magazines, a to-be-mom is ‘expected’ to be that glowing image of a woman of perfect shape, perfect hair, happily gazing at their perfect round belly while sitting in the balcony of her impeccable home, and did I mention she is always happily smiling at everyone? I was not any of it. Ha !
I couldn’t actually decide how I felt. It wasn’t as simple as a switch being flipped and turning the ‘motherly’ mode on.
In fact, when we went for our very first ultrasound, I didn’t know what to expect. So when the technician told me that that loud drumbeat was the beautiful sound of my baby’s heartbeat, I exclaimed loudly and said, “Really? I feel like ‘Ripley’ from those alien movies!”
I know I know, I feel really silly about it now, but it gave us a good laugh then. It wasn’t until my bump grew to a size of a football and I needed thrice as much space anywhere, be it the couch or getting into the car, that I started feeling different.
There were times when I would be grumpy, whiny, tearful and just pure angry for no reason at all, making it very difficult for those around me and always getting my way. I would watch a comedy and cry my eyes out and eat a large double cheese pizza all by myself. Twice a week. I blamed it all on the hormones (and sometimes still do. With two ‘kids’ – an almost 20 months old and a 33 yr old, it’s a necessity I say!).
Dunno … what would you say to a feeling where you feel incredibly happy, super cranky, tired, restless, sleepy, hungry, emotional, beautiful, fat, more hungry, sick, bloated, energetic, excited, scared, strong, vulnerable, overwhelmed, pee-machine, hot, cold-the-next-second, hungry again, won’t move a muscle tired, motivated and lost, confused, confident, did I mention hungry … all at the same time. How do you describe the “going-to-be-a-mother” feeling? Which emotion do you pick?
For me, it was feeling all of these all at once. I couldn’t put a finger on which I felt more than the other. Except that I should probably eat something while I pondered. So I would smile at the question, pick up my just delivered large pizza and put on another episode of Rules of Engagement while I ate my way through it … Like a Pigosaurus.
Become a premium user on Women’s Web and get access to exclusive content for women, plus useful Women’s Web events and resources in your city.
Published here earlier.
Image source: shutterstock
Wife. Mommy. Friend. Lover of tea and fantasy books.Blogger too. Been with the IT industry for 10 years and now on an adventure trip to explore life. JamieAndMamma is a parenting/personal blog dedicated read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
Please enter your email address