Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
These 5 new year resolutions for women are not about getting ahead at work. Instead, they touch upon the very core of our lives.
The last week of the year is usually ‘New Year Resolutions Time’. Most of us resolve something or the other…many of us follow it initially and then give up; very few of us stand by our resolutions till the end. But no matter what the destiny of that resolution is, there is always fun in deciding something genuinely.
The positive part of it is that it makes your brain work, makes you think of what you really lack and what you really need to do. Typically, for women, this list consists of weight reduction targets, a wish to be more focused on one’s studies, career or any professional trait.
However, here are a few slightly different new year resolutions for women that I think are a must on our lists.
Usually after a certain point (read age) women do not pay attention to what they like and what they do not like. The movie kids love is what Mom starts enjoying as well and the movie she wants to watch for a long time now, still remains on her must watch list.
If you ever ask my mother-in-law what ice-cream flavour we should we order for her, she would just say get the family pack of the one that everyone else is getting. I know she does not like manchow soup but she is ready to share it because no one else at home likes tomato soup. I mean there is nothing wrong in trying out new things, but then you should not be doing that so much that you do not remember your own likes anymore!
If you keep doing that, it becomes a compromise after a while. It is good to indulge in things that you love, that make you feel good. And it’s not just about feling good or not. Sometimes this habit of compromising all the time may lower your confidence too.
I remember how clear I was about what I wanted and what I didn’t when I was a teen. As I grew older, I started thinking more about others and in that process, I have made so many mistakes. I obviously cannot go back and correct that now. But yes, I would definitely not let this compromising habit impact my future anymore.
So – the first new year resolution a woman should make this year is – NOT to say ‘Anything is ok or Kuch bhi chalega‘. Don’t think so much about what others will feel or what others like. Respect your choice and make it heard!
Women have this tendency to judge other women based on the appearance, the work profile, the way of talking, the age and many other superficial things. I myself have done this so many times, and eventually, when I truly get know that person, I really feel bad about the perception I had about her.
Often, if you are preoccupied with a certain image or have had a bad experience in the past, you stereotype that kind of people, which is not correct. Every individual is different, every personality is complex, so take your time in knowing every woman. Don’t go by appearances, they definitely are deceptive!
A person who likes to wear laid back clothing does not necesarily have a laid back attitude too. A fresher joining your team probably is not as immature as you think. An aunty next door asking too many questions might be genuinely concerned, not always poking her nose into your life. So, don’t judge….just spend some time and then decide whether that person is worth going on your friends list or not.
Feeling guilty for anything and everything happening around you is the worst habit that many women have. If she has to stay late at office due to a client meeting, the guilt of depriving her kids of mom’s attention kills her; the guilt of making parents or in-laws look after the kids till late kills her.
The same evening, dear husband is late because of a school friends’ get-together and he does not feel guilty about it at all. I am not saying he should be guilty about it, but then she should not feel so guilty either because she is not doing it intentionally. If her job occasionally requires her to attend the late meetings, then why should she be guilty?
She forgets to put her husband’s packed tiffin in his office bag and it makes her feel so guilty that she skips her lunch too. The husband probably would eat outside happily. She forgets to wish her brother-in-law on his anniversary and she dies of that guilt. She forgets to get the tomatoes on her way back from office and she feels guilty that mom-in-law will need to walk to the vegetable vendor tomorrow morning.
Why should she be responsible for everything and why should she feel guilty about everything? Dump that guilt and accept the fact that you too are human and these things will happen.
Hold on before reacting
Every action will have an equal and opposite reaction. This is the law of nature. But postponing that reaction can save you a lot of stress. Someone might not mean it when they say something, but if you take a pause before interpreting and reacting, the person might realize that they said something wrong unintentionally and very well correct themselves.
I ran into fights with my husband because of my habit of reacting instantly and later felt really bad about it. So I am going to give myself of 30 mins before reacting to anyone. I guess most of us would be able to relate here. Intant reactions are usually blunt and blunt words can cause longlasting harm to your relations. So this 30 mins wait/hold before you react is a good thing to go on your resolutions list. Good for you, good for your relationships.
Women are usually considered poor at decision making. In some cases it is true. But the root cause that does not allow us to come to a decision is the fact that women overthink. We want a decision that should please everyone. We want a result that should be agreeable to each and every concerned party.
However, it may not be always possible. In the process of finding an alternative that suits everyone, we overthink the matter and are unable to conclude. Overthinking is in no way advisable for your personal as well as professional lives. Overthinking keeps you away from rational thinking. Overthinking gives your brain an opportunity to derive interpretations that may not be true.
This overthinking may not just impact your behaviour but your mental health too. It can lead to long sleepless nights causing your health to go down. So the negatives are many and positives very few. Thus, whenever you feel you are thinking too much, just pause and see if that topic is even worth thinking so much about. Be judgemental here and think only when it is needed. Do not think so much that it leaves you clueless and thoughtless.
I know these things are not very easy, but I know if I am able to follow these 5 new year resolutions for women, I definitely will be able to see a new me; it will bring up my positivity and make my new year more positive and happier.
Do think about it and if you feel they are worth trying, do add them to your new year resolutions list too. Wish you all a very happy and healthy New Year!
Become a premium user on Women’s Web and get access to exclusive content for women, plus useful Women’s Web events and resources in your city.
Top image via unsplash
A Perfect Libran, is how I define myself!! . Striking the Right Balance is my MANTRA - may it be between Life@work & Life@home, Family & Friends, Myself & My relationships. Writing is my passion, reading is my read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Being a writer, Nivedita Louis recognises the struggles of a first-time woman writer and helps many articulate their voice with development, content edits as a publisher.
“I usually write during night”, says author Nivedita Louis during our conversation. Chuckling she continues,” It’s easier then to focus solely on writing. Nivedita Louis is a writer, with varied interests and one of the founders of Her Stories, a feminist publishing house, based in Chennai.
In a candid conversation she shared her journey from small-town Tamil Nadu to becoming a history buff, an award-winning author and now a publisher.
Nivedita was born and raised in a small town in Tamil Nadu. It was for schooling that she first arrived in Chennai. Then known as Madras, she recalls being awed by the city. Her love-story with the city, its people and thus began which continues till date. She credits her perseverance and passion to make a difference to her days as a vocational student among the elite sections of Madras.
Please enter your email address