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Should I be a career oriented (bad) Bahu’, and fight for my career? I think this is a question that nearly every ambitious married woman asks herself.
To focus on our work we need to let go of a lot of family responsibilities, and this make us feel guilty. If I miss an important family function for a meeting, I am the worst ‘Bahu’. But the same done by their son can be ignored because it is his work, and it is important.
The family that boasts that they let their ‘Bahu’ work, they are so open minded. The family that talks about their Bahu’s work, (Oh, we let her work, we are so progressive!) at every opportunity that they get. The very same family talks behind her back if the Bahu is not able to do some household work because she is at work.
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They criticise her for not paying enough attention to her child. They criticise her if she expects her husband to help in the home. They criticise her if she cannot follow her family traditions.
This is the two faced reality of today’s society. They want women to work (trying to be open minded), but also be available for all family and household tasks (because traditionally it is her duty). This conflict basically results in a lot of friction amongst family members.
Our society should appreciate the work of a woman and be supportive at every step. The choices she makes are difficult, but our families have the choice to make it easier for her.
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So tired of reading language such as “let” the daughter in law work. Do the girls parents ever say they let the son in law work??? Isn’t it a given??
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