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Should I be a career oriented (bad) Bahu’, and fight for my career? I think this is a question that nearly every ambitious married woman asks herself.
To focus on our work we need to let go of a lot of family responsibilities, and this make us feel guilty. If I miss an important family function for a meeting, I am the worst ‘Bahu’. But the same done by their son can be ignored because it is his work, and it is important.
The family that boasts that they let their ‘Bahu’ work, they are so open minded. The family that talks about their Bahu’s work, (Oh, we let her work, we are so progressive!) at every opportunity that they get. The very same family talks behind her back if the Bahu is not able to do some household work because she is at work.
They criticise her for not paying enough attention to her child. They criticise her if she expects her husband to help in the home. They criticise her if she cannot follow her family traditions.
This is the two faced reality of today’s society. They want women to work (trying to be open minded), but also be available for all family and household tasks (because traditionally it is her duty). This conflict basically results in a lot of friction amongst family members.
Our society should appreciate the work of a woman and be supportive at every step. The choices she makes are difficult, but our families have the choice to make it easier for her.
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The plight of Indian women's mental health often goes unnoticed. Co-founders Vivek Satya Mitram and Pooja Priyamvada conceived the idea of the Bharat Dialogues Women & Mental Health Summit to address this.
Trigger Warning: This contains descriptions of mental health trauma and suicide, and may be triggering for survivors.
Author’s note: The language and phraseology used are not the author’s words but the terms and narrative popularly used for people living with mental illnesses, and may feel non-inclusive. It is merely for putting our point across better.
I have seen how horrifying was the treatment given to those with mental illness.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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