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In this short post, a mother reflects on why the Barbie doll cannot impact on her daughter anymore!
I used to be scared of Barbie.
Then I became a mommy to the most wonderful, impressionable and sensitive little girl. She is seven now and loves to play with dolls. Barbie with her hyper-sexualized body parts and emphasis on appearance, was making me highly uncomfortable. She represents the trap of ideas that a woman is only of use if she is pretty.
Until I grew up. Until I looked at how my daughter looks up to me . Until I realized that I have the edge here, because I am and always will be her primary role model. I will be the operating system she will download and the point of reference she will always internalize.
Barbie doesn’t stand a chance because with this in mind, I try.
I have run two half marathons in two years. I am a physician and I regularly bring my daughter to my hospital to show her where and why Mom occasionally gets delayed. I write and I have even started my own website . My home is an equal opportunities area – my husband is a wonderful partner to me (who plays badminton and occasionally quills with his daughter). My daughter and I bake, walk and most importantly, talk about everything . She knew what a period was at the age of 3 and she is very comfortable with (and proud) of the fact that she was breast fed until 5 years of age.
Most importantly, though, I am raising her to be the best version of herself – she has no need to be a wife or a mother unless she chooses to.
Barbie can’t hold a candle to me, because in everyday life I try very hard to impress on my seven year old the value and joy of being authentic and creative. With no room for the preening and primping and passivity that this foreign doll implies.
And with that reflection I am okay with my daughter bringing home this doll .
Because Barbie, you don’t scare me anymore!
Barbie dolls image courtesy Shutterstock
Megha is a physician , a mother and an avid gardener. She did a course in Mindfulness Meditation in 2009 and has applied those principles to transform the way she lives and works .She is convinced read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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