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Turning 18 takes you on a new path filled with emotions, dreams and ideas. Here are 10 important things you need to keep in mind as you travel this path.
I’m going to be turning 18 pretty soon and I got to thinking about certain things that I’ve learnt. I noted them down immediately and decided to share them. So here are 10 things, which I believe every 18-year-old -to-be or 18 and up should know.
You’re growing up, going to college, probably moving out and getting busier with your life. And it’s going to be a lot more difficult to catch up with the people you care about. So, make sure that you do talk to them enough. It won’t be possible all the time. But speak up, let it out. It will help you blow off some steam.
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
So you may have had tons of friends up until now, but you may have started realising that you’ve been losing quiet a few. It has started for a lot of us already, hasn’t it? This is good. It’s time to shorten the group. Keep only the ones who you can truly connect with and not just the ones you chill with. Handpick the few and make sure they’re your genuine friends.
Don’t be afraid to speak your mind. If you don’t like something and you think something is incorrect or that maybe you can do better, odds are that it’s probably true. Trust your intuition and explore. Don’t ever settle for anything, which you don’t believe in.
Yes, we are all looking for something good to come along. But hey, you’re 18 and love isn’t really your goal right now. Also, it’s crucial to understand that what you may have with someone right now, may not last. And that’s okay. Don’t make stupid decisions based on your boyfriend or girlfriend. Focus on yourself.
Just because something isn’t happening right now, it doesn’t mean it will never happen.
Don’t get pressurised into doing something for the sake of others. Your post-18 and early-20s are your selfish years. You are absolutely allowed to choose the options better fitting for your success or growth, no matter what. Focus on your happiness. Doesn’t matter how it effects others.
Do not be afraid to be alone. Being alone doesn’t mean you’re lonely. It is important that you are okay dining by yourself sometimes or going for a walk on your own. You need to build yourself in a way that you know you’re enough for you and that no matter what, you’re going to be alright by yourself.
Real life isn’t perfect. Things are going to blow up and you’re going to break down from time to time. Learn to deal with it. Forgive yourself. You’re only human.
Do not buy the money-is-the-root-of-all-evil crap. That’s ridiculous. You need money and it’s one of the most important things. Educate yourself, work hard and get that damn degree. Love doesn’t pay bills. You need a strong career, which helps you support yourself and your loved ones,too.
It doesn’t matter where or who you are in the world, take care of the people who’ve stuck by your side through thick and thin. These are special people who’ve gone out of their way for you. Appreciate them. Be there for them whenever they need you. Tell them how much you love them. How will you know these few? Observe the ones who genuinely celebrate your success like their very own without ulterior motives and who feel your pain with you. I’ve handpicked my few this way.
You’re the only person who can make things happen for yourself. You’re your ultimate saviour. Do things with passion and learn to strongly believe in yourself. Be unstoppable, fierce and hardworking. And last, but not the least, love yourself. You are important.
This post was first published at the author’s blog.
Image of a girl via Shutterstock
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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