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A more balanced perspective about our own culture, and that of the West, would serve us well - says this thoughtful post.
We’re quick to dismiss everything negative as ‘western culture’. A more balanced perspective about our own culture, and that of the West, would serve us well – says this thoughtful post.
I was watching a trailer for ‘The world before Her” where a lady chastises young girls for being interested in careers, and then asks a resounding question “Have we become that western?” Is having a career or leaving the hearth something the western culture has taught us? When someone talks about western culture, how much do they understand what the west stands for?
Do they know that there are enough zealots in the west who want to ‘shelter’ their women from the bad world outside? Puritans who are more conservative than the Indian pundits who ostracise the west! Well, I am not trying to weigh who is more conservative. Anything that is deemed bad or has to be proved bad is apparently from the western culture. The so-called ‘problem’ of homosexuality is western culture because Indians were “never homosexuals”. Really!?
I recently saw a movie where the film hero has to choose between an Indian girl and his western girlfriend. Can you guess which girl would cheat on him and leave him so that he is free to make the ‘right’ choice? Of course, it is the the western woman, because that’s all they do – they cheat and get divorced! On the other hand, the proper Indian girl would wear a salwar and occasionally, jeans when she has to be modern. She would also worship said hero and fast for him.
If the ideas about the west are all fueled from the movies that Hollywood churns out, can you imagine the ridiculous ideas the west or the east would get by watching Bollywood movies or TV shows? They would think that all Indian women are dressed in shining glitter when they sleep, cook, or plot revenge. They would believe that Indians react a minimum of three times to any mildly shocking incident since the camera pans the actors face at least three times with a background music of dish… dish… dish.
If the ideas about the west are all fueled from the movies that Hollywood churns out, can you imagine the ridiculous ideas the west or the east would get by watching Bollywood movies or TV shows?
They would think that all Indian women have no other goal in life other than to get married and wear make up and jewelery. They would be led to believe that all of India breaks into dance and song at the drop of the hat or dandiya, for that matter. The girl who would be covered from head to toe in the hot Indian city would suddenly be dancing, wearing skimpy clothes in Switzerland. How she got there would be a great Indian mystery!
There are people in the west that stereotype Indians and we would scream racism, but what about when we stereotype the west? I have seen blatant racism in India and sometimes, racist attitudes under the guise of caste. So what is this culture that we uphold? or is it just an excuse to maintain status quo? “The western women dress in skimpy outfits and Indian women are covered.” But did you know that the idea of the blouse comes from the west? We were pretty much blouse-less under the Saree, and clothes back then were more of a practical idea than an instrument for upholding one’s virtue.
Here is a thought, let us stop blaming the west, or for that matter, blindly aping the west. It is not all about being rigid and thinking that our own way of life is above all else. Remember, Indian culture is inclusive, has been changing, and always will be in constant flux.
Pic credit: Spookman (Used under a CC license)
Originally published at author’s blog.
A traveler at heart and a writer by chance a vital part of a vibrant team called Women's Web. I Head Marketing at Women's Web.in and am always evolving new ways in read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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