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When famous women become mothers, they are neatly classified as ‘yummy mummies’ or otherwise. What does this mean for the mother who is not a celebrity?
I stumbled upon a page about Yummy Mummies with images of our Bollywood mummies. I always knew ‘Mummy cooks Yummy food’ but never knew that she also can be …Yummy!
So, the list of Yummy Mummies includes Karishma Kapoor (‘super cool’), Malaika Arora Khan (‘extremely yummilicious’), Shilpa Shetty (‘too hot to handle’), Sonali Bendre (‘sweetest Yummy Mummy’) and if there are any more, then I am unaware. The list of not-so-yummy mummies, a few months ago, was topped by Miss World 1994.
Being a mummy myself actually makes me identify closely to a title like this. Is it really worth it to even try being one of them? Does a woman or a mother need to succumb to these pressures of looking absolutely yummy with an hourglass figure? I am a mother to a one year old daughter, and I don’t deny that I hated my body after delivery. I almost looked pregnant for the second time with a new-born baby!
I no longer look the same as I looked before pregnancy. It did take me a while to adjust to the fact that my body will take its own sweet time to regain ‘normalcy’. With a third degree tear during my daughter’s birth, I was not bothered about my looks or my weight for almost 3 months. I lived the life of a zombie with no real routine. It all depended on the baby.
After 3 months, I started feeling a bit settled with motherhood, and only then could I think about something else. I also liked reading the e-mails from baby center about the weekly development of the baby. Life was so simple – spending the entire day with her, with absolutely no worries about science or research. I got a haircut after a year and a half, and shaped my eyebrows after 4 months! All thanks to a dear friend who took the initiative of taking me out.
The Internet plays an important role in feeding you with nonsense. One day, there popped up an e-mail from baby center about ‘fitting in your old pair of jeans’. That was the moment where I got nervous, and suddenly started thinking about my weight. I wasn’t too fat actually, only 4 kilos over weight. But there is some difference in the way the body looks after the baby is born.
I don’t know what exactly the difference is but the new mother looks bloated. I was no exception (thankfully, I still fit into my old pair of jeans). Being in the UK added more fuel to the fire as the new mothers there meet over coffees, lunch, shopping, and they look absolutely stunning – like super models, with all the make up.
How the hell do they manage to apply that make up on their faces? I never had that on my mind. Looking beautiful or attractive was something I never thought about. Months passed and it got busier; with no time to look at myself, much less to think about Karisma, Lara, or Shilpa.
There was a news story (nonsense Internet scoop, yet again) where Aishwarya Rai Bachchan was compared to Lara Dutta and Shilpa Shetty. There was a link to Shilpa Shetty’s diet to regain the original pre-pregnancy figure. After reading that, I realized that following the diet is almost impossible for a mother like me who is not a celebrity with good money and cannot afford that lifestyle. I neither have any support to look after my baby when I hit the gym, nor do I have a cook to prepare all the diet food everyday!
I cannot afford that lifestyle, and it must be noted that she doesn’t have to cook, wash the utensils, do laundry, or other household chores! Our lifestyles/priorities are completely different, so this stupid stuff was out of my mind by now, and I felt happier. I stopped thinking about the calories with that dollop of ghee on my daal-rice, melting butter on my hot paneer parathas… and soon, everything was so guilt-free, though full of calories.
I stopped thinking about the calories with that dollop of ghee on my daal-rice, melting butter on my hot paneer parathas… and soon, everything was so guilt-free, though full of calories.
Very recently, I happened to watch an interview by Aishwarya Rai Bachchan about her ‘weight issues’ and she said something really sensible: every ‘body’ is different and it reacts differently under given circumstances. One should respect the way their body has reacted to a given condition. That is when I realized that she got it right!
Almost all mothers wake up early along with their kids who take tuitions or study early morning. They love being there with their kids at every moment rather than going for a walk or gym. They like dropping their kids to various dance classes, painting classes, football coaching, cricket coaching and many more extra curricular activity centres.
I know people who laugh at obese females but they don’t know the fact that most Indian women gain weight post-pregnancy. A woman gives a family happiness in the form of a child, and she undergoes tremendous pain which cannot be compared to any other pain. She sacrifices her hobbies and likes for the baby, but yet she has to face this sarcasm. I am sure that there are women who don’t like to get their pictures clicked post-pregnancy and also feel embarrassed to share their pictures.
I did start eating healthy – making salad lunches, eating more fruits- but at the end of the day I felt exhausted as I had to do so much, which needed a lot of energy. This is when I realized that staying fit is more important than following something crazy.
We Indian mothers want to give the best to our families and this comes first before everything. My love for my family is selfless and I don’t care if I am not a Yummy Mummy, but the best thing would be if I could strike a balance of both. I am trying to do that…are you?
Being in a good shape is absolutely fantastic but don’t lose your mind or sleep over it. Accept the way you look, and do what makes you happy. Being fit and healthy is good for you and your family.
P.S: “In my early teens I felt that I looked ugly – stout and dark,
In my 20’s I felt a bit more fat
In my 30’s I am fatter, trying to look young
In my 40’s I am charmless with more pounds, and feel that I looked the most beautiful in my teens.” – anonymous.
Enjoy every moment and enjoy motherhood!
Pic credit: Kit4na (Used under a CC license)
This post was first published here.