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Women make tough choices - to be a SAHM or a working mother? Which one works for you?
The decision to be a Stay-At-Home Mom (SAHM) or a Working Mom is a difficult one for many mothers.
For women who’ve become mothers after a short career (say less than 2 years) or those who’ve never worked or those who’re very sure that they don’t want to work once they’ve become mothers, it’s probably a natural choice to be Stay-At-Home Moms.
But for women who’ve had a long corporate career (say more than 8 years) or those who’re ambitious about their career goals or those who need to earn income to keep the house running or those who “truly love” their work – It becomes a difficult choice.
Should you be a “Stay-At-Home Mom” or a “Working Mom” is a difficult decision.
If you do decide to be a “Working Mom”, you’re bound to ask yourself a few hard questions:
– Will it come at a price in terms of your child’s growth and development? – Does it come with a price in terms of the emotional turmoil you go through as women? No matter how strong and focused a working mother is, there are moments of self-doubt, guilt, uncertainty, frustration, a feeling of whether it was all worth it? – Am I doing the right thing?
If you do decide to be a “Stay-At-Home Mom”, you’re again bound to ask yourself a few hard questions:
– Does this choice come at a price in terms of fulfilling your own personal aspirations and ambitions? – When you step into your 40’s or 50’s, is there not a feeling of “If only I had worked how life could / would have been..?” – What is “MY” identity? Is it as X’s wife, Y’s mother or Z’s daughter only?
No easy answers for the above.
Being Stay-At-Home Moms has its positives and negatives – both for the mother and child
Being Working Moms has its share of positives and negatives – both for the mother and child
It is a personal choice; one which women should take responsibility or ownership for.
Based on my personal experience as a working mother, here’s what I can say
– Take a decision, and take responsibility for it. Don’t regret every single day for your choices and decisions. Once you’ve made the choice, do your best every single day. – It is important for women to be open to review her own decision over a span of time, and see if she’d like to change her choices. So for e.g.: I know a lot of women who are working mothers till their kids are a specific age, and then convert to Stay-At-Home Mom’s out of choice. Or a lot of Stay-At-Home Mom’s who become Working Mothers when their kids hit a specific age.
So, make a choice. Take ownership for it. Accept the pros and cons. But be open to review your own choices as your circumstances change!
There’s no RIGHT or WRONG! It’s just a personal choice!
Pic credit: Scarygami (Used under a Creative Commons license)
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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