Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
Marriage need not run to a template based on tradition. Creating your own version of marriage can be more fun and satisfying
The glorification of marriage is the refuge of the insecure. After 2 years of socio-legal sanction, I am no more or less his than when we first committed to each other, voicing our shared desire to build a life together. The world views me now as more important, the fulfiller of a position and a role, but may I never make the mistake of viewing myself as others see me.
Seek instead, partnership. Independent of labels, a bond that values the person and not the institution within which millions are housed, regardless of the wildly varying degrees of affection and disaffection for each other. Value not your pedestal of “wife”, for signing on a dotted line didn’t grant you instant superpowers or transform you into a paragon of virtue. Your relationship is only as worthy as your closeness. Or else there would be no divorce. There would be no lonely marriages. Others wouldn’t slide in to spread warmth in the hollows you carry within you.
Get neither outraged nor uppity for being a piece of the puzzle. The world only needs you to fit. Let it not dictate the minuet within the mating dance of your marriage. Fight for that fiercely. Let it be yours alone. Unearth subsets of fresher relationships between you. Hiking buddy. Fellow foodie. Aggravator with prescient powers. Partner in crime.
Tell him your home is cleaner when he travels. But also honestly acknowledge that he is your heart. Marvel at how he slid into your mindspace; and how his nose finds the perfect parking spot in the chubbiness of your cheek. Laugh at your failures as a team. Accept you won’t be perfect. What do you plan to do for the next many years if you have nothing to mend?
Call him your roommate. Your boyfriend. Breakfast chef with benefits. But for the love of god or glitter, (if you’re atheist), spare him the relegation to the “husband” tag. That ugly black tarpaulin of a descriptor, covering all manner of bonds and equations, a pre-outlined sexist title of maleness that does a disservice to the thousands of same-sex relationships with mighty ties and loose social definitions.
If I am as radical as this, why did I bother with marriage, you might ask. And to this question, I will only smile and say not all that we do is for ourselves. I may be one among its many members, but far be it for marriage to define me, or read aloud its Manual of Acceptable Wifely Behavior while I obediently nod. I’m happy to play the game, but the rules, my friends, are his and mine alone. Within our little plot of sixty-four squares, the only person I check in with is my mate.
Dilnavaz Bamboat's heart occupies prime South Mumbai real estate. The rest of her lives in Silicon Valley, California, where she hikes, reads, hugs redwood trees and raises a pint-sized feminist. She is the read more...
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
It is shameful that in today's world too, women are abused and even killed for giving birth to a girl, and the infant's life is also of no value.
Trigger Warning: This deals with domestic violence, suicide, and violence against women, and may be triggering to survivors.
I am so glad that the esteemed courts are now giving the much-required verdicts regarding certain ideologies that were not at all entertained earlier. I mean we all have studied this much biology at our school level and it is our duty (our generation) to educate our elders about it.
Why someone have to lose a life to bring such awareness to the society. Delhi High Court gave this judgement concerning a case that filed by the deceased daughter’s parents against her in-laws. She committed suicide as she was harassed and tortured for dowry and giving birth to two daughters.
Please enter your email address