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If one were to go by reports like this one on a magistrate ruling that a 21-year old woman be returned to her parents, there is no such thing as the Adult Indian Woman. While 18 may be the legal age for attaining majority, every now and then, one comes across cases like this where courts pass orders giving parents custody of unwilling adult daughters.
The unfortunate thing is that many Indians will support this. Arguments come up like, is a 21-year old really ready to make the right decision for herself and so on. That is besides the point. No doubt, there are plenty of 21 year olds who will land up in relationships and marriages that they will regret later. Just as there are 21 year olds who will make choices that work for them. Parents can advise, help, approve or disapprove – but no one can or should force an adult to get married or move back home against their wishes. In this case I linked to above, it appears that this 21 year old had already been married to someone in Rajasthan, and she doesn’t want to join that husband either.
Which of course begs the question of whether at all she had consented to that marriage, or was forced into it. And force need not be physical – force can be emotional (I will kill myself etc) or the absence of real choices. Not preparing or letting a young woman face the world on her own by withholding education or knowledge is also a kind of force – it forces them to abide by parents’ diktats.
The question is, if our learned judges themselves will not recognise the validity of the adult Indian woman, what hope do we have? In this case, luckily the higher courts came to her rescue, but not every woman whose liberty is infringed upon is lucky enough to get there.
Founder & Chief Editor of Women's Web, Aparna believes in the power of ideas and conversations to create change. She has been writing since she was ten. In another life, she used to be read more...
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The plight of Indian women's mental health often goes unnoticed. Co-founders Vivek Satya Mitram and Pooja Priyamvada conceived the idea of the Bharat Dialogues Women & Mental Health Summit to address this.
Trigger Warning: This contains descriptions of mental health trauma and suicide, and may be triggering for survivors.
Author’s note: The language and phraseology used are not the author’s words but the terms and narrative popularly used for people living with mental illnesses, and may feel non-inclusive. It is merely for putting our point across better.
I have seen how horrifying was the treatment given to those with mental illness.
People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
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